Two days; oh, no, it’s better to call it two festivals. Is isn’t?

Singles’ Day is about to be past and tomorrow – my birthday is coming.

Single’s Day, I stayed home for a whole day. For birthday, I will go to work as usual.

People don’t like the former. For the latter, they like it, and they will usually celebrate when it comes.

For me, these two days, don’t mean much. Today is common. So is tomorrow. They are just two days as usual.

Company trifles have already get me to another world where I wouldn’t like to think about cakes and candles. Though I have been able to afford them.

Maybe next time, before long, I would forget what date the birthday is.

At that time, I would also ignore November 11th, “four sticks”. I guess.

Birthday, I’ve been not willing to mention it. Just like I received few and few greetings.

I love you so much, then won’t you die if loving me a little for repayment?

A friend said.

I changed it to another kind of expression.

You love me so much, then will I die if loving you a little for a while?

Huh, just for kidding.

Staying alone at the apartment makes me feel so blue.

It’s quiet in the room.

So is the outside.

It’s boring.

For the present job, I don’t like it. I like the industry, not this position. It’s tiring and nothing.

Every night, peering into the computer, I think about making some measures to get changes. I don’t want to fool around like this all the time. I also have ambition.

Further education or job-hopping?

I love schooling.

When I don’t know what to do, I will reinstall the applications after downloading newer editions.

I also love it.

Leave here.

Leave Beijing.

Getting on a taxi to the train station, I leave.

I'm not willing.

I go quietly.

--from mobile phone on a train

No move. No promotion. There’s no change in several months. Come on! Please go. Don’t stop.

Unexpectedly, just a minute ago, I found there’s no entries posted last month to another space of me. Nothing done in a month. I even didn’t noticed it. How time flies! I’ve no idea about it.

I wouldn’t like to get haircut before promoting back to office again. I’ve been waiting. I don’t know whether I can do that really. It’s my dream. It's my word.

You didn’t read my entries. You didn’t browse my space. You didn’t concern about me.

Some of you did; some didn’t. Actually. So that it doesn’t matter I write or not.

Few see the URL.

I’ve been unhappy for two months. I’ve not been close to you for two months.

I wouldn’t touch you.

Then gradually, everyone gets itself in some relationship.

What about me?

I missed it.

I meant to watch this solar eclipse together with you today. The news report said it comes every 500 years. Luckily, I didn’t need to go to work today. I decided to watch it. It must be very beautiful, I thought. Last week, I’ve decided to call you to enjoy this with me. It’s my plan.

But God played a joke on me. The report said the total solar eclipse would brought darkness to many places along the upper reaches of China's longest river, the Yangtze. And the city I live was not in the list of viewing cities. So I took it for granted that in this city I couldn’t see this great scene. So I slept when the solar eclipse occurred. However, in fact, there was darkness when the solar eclipse came.

I was stupid. I didn’t know it until you asked me whether I got up to see it after a few hours when we met. At that time, I knew I missed it. I regretted and blamed you for not telling me to be with you. You just replied, “Why did I need to call you to be together with me?” Yes, why did you? There’s no why.

Comparing with each other, we’re not in the same place of the other’s affection. This reason could explain it well. It also indicates there will be no good outcome. Since the total solar eclipse come to the earth every 500 years, it means I miss it forever. There’s no chance.

I missed it. Meanwhile, I’ve already missed you.

I just can’t accept seeing you run away.

It’s hot for a few weeks. Very hot. And my body has been burning by the hot weather. I don’t want to say any word. I don’t want to eat anything. There’s nothing I need. I’m trapped in chaos.

Now I find that you must learn to bear something. Experience is wealth. They told me. Or they use it to comfort me.

It’s easy for us to meet troubles. Failure can be easily “made” by us. Especially when we are growing up. Is that right?

Now I’m being so low. I want to get some changing. I don’t like the working environment for the time being. But what I only hear is chance will get to me, but please be patient to wait.

I’m still naive.

Sometimes, I’m disappointed. I know I can’t be. But it’s hard to control your mind while being tortured.

I’d like to share every word with you. And you just said some words and then disappeared. You’re busy. I robbed your time.

Sorry.

I’m not fine.

I’m not good.

I’m being the lowest.

It’s not easy to perform well at work. Office things are so complicated. How could I finish my job with a satisfying result? I need good endings. I need happiness. I don’t want to be looked down.

It’s not easy to do this kind of job. I get little after working in this city for a year.

Maybe it’s a fault to come here and work for this.

Now I find out that.

One day, I could stand in a house and look outside with you.

Owing a house by myself is a beautiful dream.

What you get is just a house after hard-working a whole life period.

What is happening between us?

What happened to you? And what to me then?

You might make me want nothing or nobody.

I’m not sure about it.

I’ve told many people that I just want to get out of the working place as soon as possible every day. I don’t want any more.

But few believe it.

What are you thinking about?

You stopped. I stopped. Then we stopped.

You didn’t talk. I didn’t talk. Then we had no talk.

Neither would break the ice.

After that, we are done?

We both thought a lot, but talked less.

Close distance didn’t mean close feelings.

You closed the door on me. I felt black.

Sorry, I’m so tired. I have been exhausted, I think. I can feel that.

Sorry, I haven’t written something seriously for a long time. I don’t know what Space entry is now.

Everything changed since the day of February 23rd. It leaded my life to another kind of situation. I’m trapped. I’m depressed.

I’m busy.

I’m burdensome.

What can I do now?

When will I write next entry?

The year of 2009 comes.

I'm coming here to say hello to it, the new year, 2009. Of course, first of all, Happy New Year! Best wishes for everyone in the new year. May all of you happy every day.

2009, it's a new year, new beginning. Especially for me, it's a brand new year. It's totally different from the past years. Why? It's been the first new year since I worked. I'm working at the transition of 2008 and 2009. Before that, I was living for schooling. Now I live for survival, for myself. I've been on the way of making an earning. That's my new life.

In Chinese language, according to the pronunciation, 2008 and 2009 both sound so nice. 8 means prosperity, while 9 eternity. They are both good words. But it seems not to be that. Everything around me in 2008 wasn't fine. There was so much failure. Schooling, living, loving, working, etc. Everything's not satisfying. Yes, I got a job before graduation and now work in the industry of finance. But I don't think it's good. I'm not satisfied with the current situation. I thought I could make it better.

Whatever, fact has been the fact. Now I just pray everything would be a little better than it is being now. Men always care a lot about their career. So do I. In 2009, after a not wonderful beginning, I hope I could do better on my job. I wish to get more real things from the job. Good salaries and promotion must be quite great. Although they're difficult to get, I've been thirsty for them. I can't stand days of being ordinary.

I'm not scared of work pressure and hardship. I just want to get what I should get. Am I demanding? If there's equity still existing, my demand will not be hard. Sorry, it sounds fantastic.

Hello 2009! A man is staring at you.

This morning, I received a letter from CMB. There was a card in the envelope. I knew it's my credit card coming.

And it's my first credit card. It's funny that my first card is from CMB, not the bank I work in. Anyway, no matter which bank it belongs to, it's a credit card. I can use it for overdraft consumption. That's the most important thing. What I need to do is trying promoting it to a gold card.

Where is my second credit card? I'm not expected. For me, till now, one card is enough. I don't want to be a slave of colorful cards.

Introduction: All types of the credit cards issued by CMB measure up the international standard and combine the RMB and USD account into one card that can be accepted around the world. Our customer enjoys the convenience of online banking service, the reassurance of zero risk after reporting lost, and 24 hours service through the hot line. We also offer various ways of making the payment and the handy procedure of paying USD statement by RMB. The long interest-free period, permanently effective points and the installment plan add the pleasure of using the card.

Long time no see.

Long time no update.

I’m very sorry for the descending frequency of writing new posts. Once upon a time, I could wrote at least four entries a month. Generally speaking, one post would be posted every seven days. Even, I would wrote more than two in a week when there was something worth recording.

But now, I haven’t written anything for nearly twenty days. I don’t know why. It’s so difficult to specify the reasons. What I only know is I’m being tired. So, I’m not very “willing” to write something with the keyboard.

Honestly, I’m not busy. There are not too much work waiting for me to do every day. However, I become tired because of my job. Or my assignment. I didn’t do very well with my current position. I didn’t do as well as other fresh people. Well, there’re some reasons within this. Some must be involved with myself, I think. Anyway, tomorrow I will make some changes on it. I would be very excited if the changes really worked. I couldn’t fall behind other workmates. That would be no explanation.

Now get back to Windows Live system. I like calling it system. Because I think this system contains many contents. Messenger, Mail, Spaces and so on, all are useful. And it really contains some others things that I love. Mood, attitude, style, thinking… I love them all. It’s this integrated system that makes me feel rich every day. Although I’m not rich at all.

These days, I didn’t use MSN frequently like before. So with Spaces. I didn’t write posts. I didn’t even go to other people’s spaces for some reading and commenting. I didn’t mean it. This situation will be changed soon. I really hope to write more. I will write more as possible as I can after everything gets back to normal. Before that, there’s a question.

Are men also strongly influenced by some virtual things? Such as, mood.

I wanna say “Thank you” here.

To people who said “Happy birthday” to me face to face, sent me a short message or even gave me a phone call, I really appreciate your wishes for birthday. Although I didn’t have a wonderful birthday, there was still a short time when I felt somewhat happy. That’s enough.

Thank you for pray from all of you. Best wishes for you.

Thank you.

Happy Birthday, I said to myself.

No cakes, no candles, no gifts, either. It’s just a weekday again. It’s just another working day, like last weekend. Today seems not different from former days. I still got up early and caught the bus for a temporary task. The task was carried out in a university which was located in the suburbs. So I had to get up very early and hurried to that university which was so far away from downtown. And then I would begin the day’s work. After finishing a whole day’s cheesed work, I caught the bus to get back to downtown. When the bus came, it’s almost dark and I got hungry. Meanwhile, the traffic jam came. I didn’t know how many hours I spent in the bus.The only thing I knew is just when the bus stopped, I stopped zizz.

Indeed, working in a whole day for work you don’t want to do can kill you. Doing something you’re not willing to do with people you don’t want to work with always makes you crazy. Then, endlessly depressed. Fortunately, this ugly task has been finished. I needn’t stay in that dull place any more.

I don’t want to do this any more. I don’t want to write more, either. After updating all items of age on websites and IM clients, I became quiet again. Then I typed two words in a picture below.

It’s a beautiful picture, I said.

It’s just what I said to myself.

Today is Mid-Autumn Day. Also, it's a day for family reunion, like the Spring Festival.

Furthermore, it's the first Mid-Autumn Day holiday upon China. This allows people to go home, especially for those people who work far away from hometown. They can spend the beautiful night with their family. It must be very warm.

A online survey tells that there are 55.7 percent of the 1,313 respondents saying they would spend the holiday with their families. So it's not only a moon-day, but also a family reunion day.

On December 16th, the Chinese government revised the nation's official holiday schedule to add Mid-Autumn Day, in response to public demand. Some said it would help the festival to revive its tradition. I'm sure of that.

Like other Chinese people, I got three days off. Yesterday afternoon I got back home to spend this holiday with my parents. This afternoon, my brother also got back. Tonight, we had dinner outside and then took a walk along the river. Since we all became adults and had our own things to do, it's not easy for us to sit together and spend free time. Now I cherish days we being together very much.

I could get more money. But I could only get one family.

We will graduate in about twenty days. But I haven't receive the certain offer. I'm very worried about my being employed. Now sitting in the waiting room of the airport, I couldn't help thinking about the direction of my flight, of my life.

Where to fly? I don't mean the flight, I mean my job and my career.

The direction of the flight is certain. But the one of the life is not, especially mine. I can't see where my offer is. I don't know which city I will live in, which company or organization I will work in, whom I will work with. There are a lot of "don't know" in my world. Even I don't know which country I will work in during the following years. Because a state-owned company asked me whether I would be willing to work in abroad. Really very, very uncertain.

The plane is to take off soon. I have to board my plane quickly. I have to fly to an unknown place which is not very remote. I'm flying with many "not belonging to fly" factors.

What else can I do? Except waiting in front of the boarding gate. It seems the flight will be delayed because of the thunder and rain in the afternoon.

I don't know when to fly, either.